By Laura Of Arabia
19 July 2010
The title of an article, published in the July 18th, 2010 edition of Arab News, rubbed me the wrong way! The title of the article was, “Saudis Warned Against Marrying Foreign Women”. The headline makes it sound like the foreign women are the source of the problem. I see it another way.
There are many foreign women, from a multitude of nationalities, living here in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia with their Saudi husbands – happily! Many of these marriages have lasted for numerous years.
The problems discussed in the article, including wives and children left homeless and sexually transmitted diseases are a reult of young Saudis travelling abroad looking for fun and excitement. Because they consider themselves “Good” Muslims, they enter into “marriages” (I use the term loosely) with foreign women while abroad. Their only intention is self satisfaction.
They rarely tell the woman that they are only marrying her for a short while. Most foreign women, unfamiliar with this game, assume that the men are truly smitten and really wish to marry them. After the woman submits, the man divorces her and leaves the country. If a child is conceived, the man denies any involvement and any responsibility.
Gentlemen, call it what you want, this is not marriage. In Islam, a man has duties in marriage. He must present a dowry to the woman and he must support her and her children. Temporary marriages are forbidden.
Taking advantage of a woman for your own pleasure, failing to support her and failing to acknowlede your offspring is haram! You are only fooling yourself. It doesn’t matter where the woman is from – India, Asia, Europe or America. Would you accept such a marriage for your sister? – I think not.
I’d like to conclude with a piece of advice for the “foreign” women out there. Be Careful! Be careful, if you are dating a Saudi man or if you are thinking about marrying one. Make sure that he has the permission of the Saudi government to take a foreign wife and make sure that his family is aware and accepting of you. Don’t believe everything that he tells you. Saudi men love to please. They may tell you something because they think it will make you happy. Others will tell you something just to get what they want.