Who are you? My name is Jenniffer I am a 34 year old mother of three wonderful children.
Your nationality and country of residence: I am a Caucasian American.
What is your job/hobbies? I am a stay at home mother.
Are you married to a Saudi: No, I am married to a wonderful man who’s love and support still amazes me.
When/where did you meet your Saudi? Over five years ago while I was working at a local cellular phone company. I had the privilege of meeting Sultan and the whirlwind romance began……Ugh. I was so naive.
Did your family accept your Saudi? No, amazingly enough my mother was right. I’m sorry Mom. I should have listened.
Did your Saudi’s family accept you? I thought they did. That was a mistake on my part for not getting my information first hand.
Do you have children? Yes 3 amazing little angels. Two girls, and one ornery Saudi boy.
Will your Saudi be involved in raising the child/children? No. Despite all my previous attempts my Saudi has refused all contact with his son, even though he lives 5 minutes away.
However, I admit I am glad he will not be involved in my son’s life. I have everything I need and so does my son. My son calls my husband Daddy and until he is of proper age he will continue to know my husband as the loving father he truly is. I am blessed that my son will not have a large void in his life. Some day my son will have questions that I can not answer, and for that I hope he will have easy access to ask his biological father the questions that all children who who have a missing biological parent want to know.
How do you feel about Saudis and non-Saudis marrying? I think it is wonderful when any human finds love and marriage.
What advice would you give a non-Saudi involved with a Saudi? So you found yourself in love with a Saudi Student…here are a few important things you must know:
Your Saudi will likely return home regardless if he has told you otherwise. They are expected to by there families. They are here to get an education, then go home and get married to a Saudi woman and start their own family. Their plan does not not involve us.
If you are not married to the Saudi AND have met his family ANY sexual relationship you have with your Saudi is forbidden, and these young men know that. Sex before marriage may seem normal to us, but it is NOT the case with them. Actually, to these men the minute they “bed you” any respect they actually had for you is gone and replaced with lust. Please take to time to read The Holy Qur’an to get the answers there, not from your Saudi’s lips.
Does my Saudis family have more than one wife? There is a clue as to how they were raised, and what is considered completely acceptable behavior.
If your Saudi is more involved in the party scene of their new culture than their studies, this is not the Saudi that will take you home to meet Mom and Dad, and not the one who will stay with you.
Find out how your Saudi’s family views you. How do they see you as a woman? Talk with his sisters. Be informed!!!
Dont be afraid to ask questions . If your Saudi refuses your questions, you know he is keeping things from you.
“What happens when I get pregnant and have a child with this Saudi?”, you may ask yourself. “What do I do now?”
First off, thank you for being courageous enough to bring your baby into the world. So many women take the easy way out, and choose not have the child. Thank you for choosing life, as those who have our little Saudi children feel blessed every day and few have regretted the decision to keep their children.
Now for the hard part. Unfortunately, your Saudi may have bailed once or twice by now, possibly throwing accusations of you getting pregnant on purpose, accusing entrapment, blah blah. Dont let that get to you. They know the truth. Some use this as a way of angering you, and trying to make you look bad.
Don’t ignore your gut feeling. When these men have shown their real faces, don’t be that woman that turns a blind eye and later wonders what happened. You’re a mother now, it’s time to be strong and courageous. Show our children what heights we can scale, even on our own.
Get information on your Saudi’s Family. This is important for finding him when he gets home. If you have acess to his driver’s license, passport, school info, etc… GET IT COPIED!!!!! These are the fathers of your children! It is not overstepping to have as much information on the man whose child you are raising.
If you contact his family with this glorious news, don’t expect to be welcomed or accepted. You must understand how these Islamic families see a woman who is pregnant out of wedlock. Sadly, our children will never be considered “part of the family”.
Now that you have suffered through the broken promises and lies, and your Saudi is back in Saudi Arabia, will you hear from him? Dont expect it. The sad truth is that almost all of these men who have become fathers will never contact you or your child because they don’t have to, and there is no one forcing these men to pay any reparations whatsoever. Like the old adage, “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas”.
If we want to make a difference and see these men held accountable, we must stand together. I invite everyone to join us on the Facebook page to help get the word spread. If we get enough support it will be difficult for KSA to continue to turn a blind eye to these absconding fathers.
How far are you willing to go for your child? Are you ready to stand up and fight for your child’s right to be acknowledged? We can spare our children the pain of silence in 20 years if we stand up now for what is right!!!!
Why do you write? In hopes of uniting women in need who have children with Saudi men who have chosen not to be involved in there children’s lives. Through this I hope to gain support in growing numbers to show how large the problem is. These women need to know that they are not alone.
What are some examples of the main topics you discuss? I talk about the many ways to be better informed on the Saudi culture and the men who come from there.
What benefits do you expect readers to get? I hope to show women everywhere who have come to find themselves in this situation that they are not alone, and that there are others out there, veritable mirror images of themselves, who can offer hope and friendship. Information on contacts in the embassy as well as helping women find financial and medical coverage in the areas they live in.
What are your hopes for the future? I hope to force KSA to give us an answer to our questions as to why this problem continues unchecked.
Use this space to write anything else you would like to say: Royal embassy of Saudi Arabia and the The Cultural Attaché Office. Why do all the letters ,e-mails, and calls go unanswerd. Are you oblivious?
I am sure my country thanks you for sending your people here to study, helping the colleges get large sums of money during a time of some recession. Your young men spend money on alcohol, big screen TVs, gaming systems, and, oh yes…. the new flashy car. Again, helping the economy…although most forget to buy books or paper for class.
Our government only has to help with the medical card, food stamps, and WIC, but hey… fair trade.. Your young men get the education while our women get left with a lifetime reminder of a bad Saudi man. Is this the image you wish to continue to portray?