Kat Is Devastated; Is There Anything She Could Have Done Differently?

photocreditbigisthenewsmallKat, I’m very sorry for the late reply. Thank you for visiting FHWS and submitting your personal story. You asked if there is anything you could have done differently. Other than magically becoming a Saudi woman overnight, you’ve probably done all that you could do. Your personal story is a common refrain on this blog and you’re not alone in having to go through this. You can take heart in the fact that your Saudi co-worker apparently tried his hardest to get his family to accept you but it still stings that he gave up. Honestly, would you want to be a part of a family who objects to you? Would you still want to marry a man who gives in easily to his family? Is he really worth all the trouble and pain? Maybe this happened for the best. Maybe this is a sign that you should reevaluate your situation and move on to finding something better. May Allah guide you to Islam and grant you a righteous and courageous Muslim brother whose family accepts you for YOU ameen. 


Your name, nickname or anonymous: Kat

Type or copy/paste your submission here: Hello Tara. I am glad I came across your blog to at least share my story as it has been very frustrating to be in this situation. I am a non-Saudi & non-Muslim, I’ve been working here in the Kingdom for almost 3 years now. My co-worker, who is a Saudi, have informed his family of his intentions of marrying me. However, his parents refused and he argued several times to try to convince them but to no avail. They insisted that he has to marry one of his cousins, and told him that any interracial marriage would never work out. Deeply saddened by what I have learned, I kept my hopes high and prayed that his parents would change their minds. Unfortunately, he again argued with his father about it a few days back then yesterday, he told me while crying that they decided to engage him this weekend, without any further delay, he asked for my forgiveness because he did everything but his father said he would disown him and that his mother would never forgive him if he marries from another nationality. Truly, I am devastated. I’m thinking could I have done something about it by any means? Asked from anybody on how to go about the situation? Nobody gave me a chance. I respect Islam, and I am aware that you cannot be forced into marrying someone if you do not want to. Yet, I also know that he would not want his entire family against me so he had to submit to their decision. Now, I’m worried about the emotional trauma this has caused him, it left him with sadness and anger. If I could only find an answer that would be able to help us both, I would do it. As of this moment, I’m still hoping…praying…

Are you a non-Saudi man married to a Saudi: Yes

Are you submitting a personal story or an interview: Personal story

Photo Credit: Big Is The New Small


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Tara Umm Omar

American married to a Saudi.

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