Saudi Woman Wants To Marry A Non-Saudi

779ca28e624dd5036b0f6a7067006db6Anyone interested is advised to review the new rules for marriage between a Saudi woman and non-Saudi man to make sure they qualify for permission. Contact me by email for further details: taraummomar at hotmail dot com. Please feel free to share this with others. Thank you and best wishes!

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I believe no one will know what I’m looking for in a husband better than me. So, I’m posting this with the help and encouragement of my friend Tara Umm Omar.

Age: 38

Marital status: divorced

Children: none (would like children insha’Allah)

Education: Master’s Degree

About me:

I’m a well-educated Saudi girl, open-minded, optimistic and a happy person. I’m adventurous by nature and I like a simple life. Alhamdulillah I’m someone who enjoys life to the fullest, within Islamic limits, of course. I respect my religion, alhamdulillah, and do my best to be a good Muslimah. Actually, I did turn down many offers because I’m not looking to get married just for the sake of being married. If I don’t find a good match, I prefer to stay single. For me, marriage is an interesting journey that ends up in paradise insha’Allah. My main concern is that the one who I get married to is someone compatible with me, mature, honest and a good Muslim with good manners. Most importantly, I’m not for polygamy.

Just for clarification:

I want to marry for the deen and not for culture. Please don’t get me wrong, I do respect and appreciate Saudi and Arab men in general. But I believe my mentality and the way I see life and marriage doesn’t go well with them. There would be clashes and Allah knows best. Moreover, each person in this life has the right to look for what suits him best.

What I’m looking for:

I’d like to marry a Muslim man, preferably an American or Canadian who currently resides in Saudi Arabia. Someone who cares very much about Islam, prays his 5 prayers and maintains his life based on Qur’an and Sunnah. I want a mature honest man whom I can depend on after Allah Almighty. He is open-minded, respects women and knows how to deal with his wife. He has a sense of humor and knows how to enjoy life. Regarding his age, I am open to marrying someone younger than me as long as he is responsible, mature and a real man. But not older than 40 years (I can explain more later). Please no smokers.

My expectations:

I’m a real woman for a real man insha’Allah. A real man seeks a best friend and a partner, not a maid. He doesn’t need her to cook and clean after him because he is independent. Should something happen to his wife, he is able to do anything by himself because he is no mama’s boy. He doesn’t stop his woman from pursuing her dreams. He doesn’t set goals for her such as being only a housewife. He supports her in everything and is not afraid of her intellect, dignity, self-confidence and independence. He looks for an independent woman because he knows should anything happen to him, everything will be fine because his woman is able to deal with anything on her own. He is not afraid to ask her for her opinion, appreciates and listens to good discussions. He does not have an attitude that “I’m always right”, regardless of the subject. He is ready and able to consider every situation from many different angles and make a good decision. He is not shy to roll up his sleeves and wash the dishes, make dinner or do the vacuuming. He is not afraid or too lazy to do anything around the house that should be done not because he is “helping out” his wife but because he lives in the same house with his wife. He is smart enough to know how to communicate with his wife, to sense a problem before it happens and to kindly resolve any misunderstanding that happens for whatever reason. Also, he is aware of and cares about his wife’s intimate needs and does his best to keep her satisfied. He never says anything negative about his wife, not to his friends, family, neighbors or anyone. If he has any complaints, he explains to his wife in a kind way so she completely understands his viewpoint. If he is reasonable and his views are convincing then she is reasonable enough to accept and do her best to make amends.

A real woman does not need a man because she needs money, she has her own passion and makes her own money. She doesn’t need money, jewelry, expensive clothes, cars or make-up to feel that her man appreciates and values her. She needs a man and partner but most importantly, a best friend who will consider her opinion as important as his and who understands her dreams and fears. She is ready to do anything to make her man happy, be it making some popcorn for him at midnight or running with him 10 laps around the area. She respects him in every aspect and would never humiliate him when alone or in front of other people (especially the latter). She is aware that respect is the most important thing in their relationship. She knows she should show appreciation for his patience and understanding of the things he does to make her happy. She knows that the best way to reward his initiative and actions, etc., is by stating her appreciation loudly and clearly. Any time there is a misunderstanding, she kindly and patiently explains the problem, its cause and effect and suggests possible solutions.

Real men and real women know that a conflict is pointless when they don’t learn a lesson from it. Every time a conflict arises, they will realize their mistakes and make sure that they will not repeat the same mistake. They know that being angry for stupid, little things without valid reasons, poisons the relationship and so they avoid that at all cost. They know that, at the end of the day, no matter how hard or long it may be, they are to hug each other before falling asleep. When criticizing each other, they both know they should do it only in private, in the most kind and open way, making sure to gather the right arguments and presenting them clearly and eloquently. And absolutely not in the moment they meet first time after a long day at work, after some stressful event or long trip, etc.

They are aware that this life is short and they don’t know how long they will stay together as only Allah, subhanAllahu wa ta’ala, knows how many days each person has on this earth. So they appreciate every moment together, making them great moments and some time later, great memories.

No one is perfect and I’m not trying to idealize myself but, ahamdulillah, I’m confident that I can make a good wife and expect the same from my future partner insha’Allah.

Photo Credit: Yahoo! News

Obligatory Premarital Drug Tests For Non-Saudi Men Marrying Saudi Women

truck-drug-testPremarital Anti-Drug Test A Must For Expats Marrying Saudi Women
Gulf Digital News | Manama
8 October 2016

Expatriates wishing to marry Saudi women have to undergo a premarital test to ensure they do not take drugs. The new measure which took effect a few days ago makes it mandatory for foreigners to run the test before submitting their marriage applications.

Jeddah health premarital centre director Ali Al-Zahrani said results of the test would be announced within three days. The health authorities have exempted foreign women, who are married to Saudi nationals, from undergoing the test.

“The marriage application is rejected automatically in case the applicant tests positive”, Al-Zahrani said, adding that the test would also cover all types of narcotics and liquor. The authorities have reported no positive cases so far among the expatriates who applied to marry Saudi women.

The premarital test would also include Human Immunodeficiency Virus infection and Acquired Immune Deficiency syndrome (HIV/AIDS), hereditary diseases, hepatitiss B or C.

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Age Requirements Increased For Saudis Marrying Non-Saudis (40 For Men And 30 For Women)

marra-640x411I was alerted by a FHWS reader who confirmed with the emarah that these new laws are in effect.

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Saudi Men Must Be Aged Between 40 And 65, Women Between 30 And 55
By Habib Toumi, Bureau Chief
13 October 2016
Gulf News | Manama

A Saudi man has to be between 40 and 65 years old to be able to marry a non-Saudi woman, and a Saudi woman has to be between 30 and 55 if she wants to take a non-Saudi husband, according to new rules.

Saudi nationals need special permissions to take non-Saudi spouses and the new requirements are on a 17-point list issued to govern the marriages of Saudis with foreigners, Saudi daily Al Eqtisadiya reported on Thursday.

Under the new rules, a Saudi man has to make at least 3,000 Saudi riyals (Dh2,935) a month and to have an adequate house or apartment to have his mixed marriage approved.

The woman that he wants to marry must be at least 25 years old and the age difference between the two spouses in all cases must not exceed 30 years.

If the applicant is divorced, at least two years should have passed following the separation before he applies to marry a foreigner, and in case he is married with a Saudi woman and wants a foreigner as a second wife, he must produce a certificate from a public or private hospital stating that his first wife is unable to assume all her marital responsibilities or is infertile. The certificate must be endorsed by the ministry of health.

The applicant must also sign a document stating that the approval of the marriage does not necessarily mean that his foreign wife would be granted the Saudi citizenship.

The rules for Saudi women planning to marry foreigners include a clause that stipulates that the age difference between them must not exceed 10 years.

The condition was set to ensure there is no exploitation of Saudi women, the daily said.

The only exception for the minimum age for the woman is the existence of a physical handicap or special needs, including being born to unknown parents.

In such cases, the minimum age is lowered from 30 to 27 and should be approved by the social affairs ministry.

A non-Saudi cannot take a Saudi wife if he is already married or if he had married a Saudi woman. He must also present a certificate showing that he has no criminal record in his country of origin and in Saudi Arabia.

He must also present evidence he is not suffering from any infectious or genetic diseases. He must not have been a member of the military in a foreign country, must not be on the lists of those banned from entering Saudi Arabia, must have a monthly salary of at least 5,000 Saudi Riyals and a valid residence permit and must possess an appropriate family residence.

He must not be stateless and must have a specific nationality and must prove it with a passport from his country that has at least another 12 months of validity. He must also clear all security checks to be carried out by the competent authorities in Saudi Arabia.

The Saudi woman has to sign a statement that her marriage with a foreigner did not necessarily mean he or their children would have the right to be granted the Saudi citizenship.

The new regulations call for the establishment of a committee tasked with looking into all applications by Saudis to take foreign spouses.

The members should give their opinion on the request within one month of receiving the application.

Around one third of the 28 million people living in Saudi Arabia are foreigners, working mainly in the construction and service sectors.

Photo Credit: Saudi Gazette

Drug Testing Now An Obligatory Part Of Pre-Marital Medical Checkups

photocredittreatmentandrecoverysystemsDrugs Test Obligatory For Expats Wishing To Marry Saudi Women
By Fatima Al-Dubais
Okaz/Saudi Gazette | Dammam
8 September 2016

Instructions have been issued by supreme authorities to make drug tests part of the pre-marital medical check-ups especially for expatriates wishing to marry Saudi women or vice versa, informed sources have said.

The pre-marital medical check-up is obligatory for both Saudi men and women.

Authorities said foreigners should run this test before submitting their marriage applications.

Saudi men wishing to marry foreign women and foreign women wishing to marry Saudi men should obtain the approval of the concerned authorities before tying the knot.

The sources said the directives will prevent embarrassment the men and women usually experience for undergoing this particular test since it has now been made an integral part of the pre-marital medical examination.

They recalled that a number of official and public requests were made in the past few years calling for the drug tests before marriage. The sources said the test will prevent a number of family problems which might crop up as a result of one of the couples being a drug addict.

Photo Credit: Treatment And Recovery Systems

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Judges Acting As Guardians In The Marriages Of Saudi And Non-Saudi Women

photocreditinlightpressSaudi Judges Help 394 Filipinas Get Married
Gulf News | Manama
By Habib Toumi, Bureau Chief
23 August 2016

Judges in Saudi Arabia helped 394 Filipinas get married by acting as their guardians in 2015, official records show.

Under Saudi laws, a woman can get married after a guardian — usually her father or brother — approves the wedding.

However, in case the guardian is absent or does not approve the union, a judge may step in and assume the guardianship.

According to the figures released by the justice ministry, judges acted as guardians last year in 517 wedding contracts, with Filipinas representing the vast majority.

The figures showed that judges helped 16 Saudi women get married through their guardianship.

Three of the Saudi women married Filipinos, and three others married Syrians, while in the other marriages, the husbands were from Egypt, Jordan, India, the US and Yemen.

Foreigners make up around one-third of the total population of Saudi Arabia estimated at 30 million people.

The justice ministry said there were 4,983 divorces in 2015 — attributed mainly to irreconcilable differences, problems with spouses, the long absence of the husband, the imprisonment of a spouse or difficulties in consummating the marriage.

According to the figures, 4,425 Saudi couples were divorced last year.

Photo Credit: In Light Press

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2015 Statistics For Saudi/Non-Saudi Marriages

photocreditafpSaudi Women Not Far Behind Men In Marrying Foreigners
Arab News | Riyadh
23 July 2016

Saudi women have joined Saudi men in their penchant for foreigners as life partners. The Ministry of Justice revealed in new statistics that the number of marriage contracts of Saudi men to non-Saudi women last year reached 3,596, while female Saudi marriage contracts to non-Saudi males reached 3,352.

The statistical reports stated that the number of divorces among Saudis last year reached 40,000, representing almost a third of the marriage contracts in the same year, of around 133,000 contracts.

The report explained that the divorce contracts issued from Saudi courts for Saudis in Makkah region reached 10,345, 26 percent of the total divorce contracts issued by various courts in all regions of the Kingdom during the past year, followed by Riyadh, which reached 9,470 contracts, or 23 percent.

The divorce contracts in the Eastern Province reached 4,727, or 12 percent of total divorce contracts.

Statistics also revealed that the number of divorces between Saudi men to non-Saudi women last year reached 1,593, while divorces between Saudi women and non-Saudi men reached 700. The divorces between non-Saudi men and non-Saudi women reached 3,686.

Photo Credit: AFP taken from Aawsat

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“Expired” Saudi Women Are Increasingly Gravitating Towards Marrying Non-Saudi Men

photocreditfineartamericaWith Relationships, We Find Happiness In Our Own Way
By Rym Ghazal
The National – Opinion
20 July 2016

“I just got so tired of Arab men and their games.”

This month, a Saudi friend announced that she is marrying an American man. She is one of seven friends who, over the past two years, have found love and the man of their dreams outside their community and culture.

She is the third to marry an American. Two others married Italians, one married a French man and the other married a Canadian.

While we shouldn’t really be making a big deal of nationalities, what is interesting is that all of these women were in their thirties and had been marked “expired” by their families. And, quite openly and rudely, they were told by some Arab men they had met that they were too old to be valued as a potential wife.

Of course, it is more complicated than simple matters of age and backgrounds, and we probably shouldn’t generalise – there are many, many happy marriages between Arabs – but there is something here to explore.

By no means can we say that this is something new, given that older female members of my own family have married European men. At the same time, there are no proper statistics on this for us to be able to make sweeping statements such as “more and more Arab women are marrying non-Arabs”.

The high-profile marriage of Lebanese lawyer Amal Alamuddin to the American actor George Clooney in 2014 brought some of these discussions to light. At the time, she was in her thirties, quite independent and strong – and these were given as reasons why Clooney appreciated her.

Taking a step back, I have heard over and over again that women who have worked hard and are pioneers in their own rights have difficulty finding partners who appreciate them as they are.

“I feel I am constantly being assessed if I am worthy of becoming his wife,” said a friend who ended up marrying an Italian man.

“My husband loves me as I am. And those things my Arab ex didn’t like or took for granted, my husband loves and appreciates,” she says.

She, like my other friends who married foreigners, said that she felt she could be herself around her husband.

What is interesting is that I have also heard this from Arab men who married foreigners. They even admit they treat the foreign women better than they did their Arab exes. Why do that? Why do we put on masks and act out roles when we are around someone from our own nationality or background?

Arab men have been marrying women from different backgrounds for centuries, but Arab women have generally stayed within their own circles. The few rebellious ones who married outside their culture had to make great sacrifices.

I am all for mixing nationalities, because I come from a mixed background. I find that embracing differences and loving someone for their hearts and who they are is more important than how they “should be” or how they are on paper. But each to their own; people find happiness in their own special way.

Last week I addressed the issue of “uqdet el khawaja” (the foreigner complex), referring to how some Arabs appear to prefer to work with and buy from foreigners rather than from their own people. While many hate to admit it exists, it even makes an appearance when we are looking for partners.

It should not come as a surprise, given this phenomenon, that some Arabs seek to marry outside of the culture.

These are sensitive issues and difficult to discuss without ruffling feathers. Whatever the case, it is not only Arabs who think that certain marriages can change their lives for the better. Ultimately, it is really all in our heads and only we can start to change that.

rghazal@thenational.ae

Twitter:@Arabianmau

Photo Credit: Fine Art America

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